Dad of U14 w/? for parents of U15

My son came to me last night and stated that he might not want to play club soccer next year. His reasoning is that he will be in HS and will be "so busy". No final decision was made last night.

I remember quitting soccer just before HS and wanting a do-over a few years later. He wants to play soccer for his HS and he enjoys his current club team more than any other club he has ever played for. I am on board with his desire to play HS soccer but think it would be a mistake not to be playing in the meantime.

Have you had to address this with your son? Is HS life so busy that the schedule of club soccer makes it that much more difficult? Any advice?

My BB is U16 and has definitely had a lot going on during the HS season. I think the level of business depends on how much practice / tournament play his Club team does during the HS season. We were fortunate and the coach didn't schedule too much for our boys during the HS season and we played in no tournaments. Obviously we still practiced but not twice a week until the past couple of weeks. Classic League holds off on the boy's season during the HS season - we just played our first club game yesterday. I am our team manager and put together a calendar for our club coach with the boy's HS schedules so he could see how many boys he'd be missing if he were to play in a tournament - particularly the tournament schedule during January...that's when lots of pre-season club tournaments start up and all of the HS pre-season tournaments are played as well. HS coaches say they will work with club, but in our experience, it is not beneficial for the BB to miss HS play for club!

It can definitely be exhausting for them...last week for example, we had club practice Monday night, HS game Tuesday, club Wednesday, HS game Friday. It's a tough decision...but you have to evaluate what both of his teams will have going on. It's only 3 months but can definitely be an exhausting 3 months if the club team doesn't cut back any during HS.

Our club team pretty much took off for 2 months and then picked up the last 6 weeks or so leading up to Dallas Cup. We practiced twice a week and sometimes 3x's on Saturday's. High School sports is all about the social aspect, the soccer is not that good - it is who has the BSF athletes with little regard for skill and very direct. I would keep him in Club - they front load the club season for high school kids and then it ramps up after regular high school season is over. High school before the season practices ever day and mine got in even better shape. Once the season starts they never practice the day after games so they practice Monday, Play Tuesday, study hall wednesday, practice Thursday, and Play Friday.

Mine has said multiple times, it is so good to be playing with my club team again - they are so much better than high school and play "real" soccer.

I addressed this with my BB about a month ago.

My BB plays Classic '98.
For me, the fee is totally within my budget because it's an independent club.
Since he has gotten a taste of High School soccer, he's loving the hell out of it.
But, the training to stay at the level he's playing at is solely thanks to his CL coach and not the High School coach.

High School practice is more just a kick around and drills that he could get playing rec.
His CL coach is on his and his team mates butts for every little misstep.

I'm pretty sure that there at a lot of good High School coaches.
But unfortunately, my BB doesn't play for one.

If my BB doesn't want to play Select/CL anymore, that's his decision.
He wants to quit when he's in the 11th grade and play only High School ball.
He also plays on an adult team in the Summer when he leaves for 1 1/2 months to his mom's country.

I have a 96 who does CL D1, HS and other programs and a 98 that has many times been asked to play club but does not care to be that serious. 98 does HS and usually plays up in rec and occassionally guests in club.
If he is taking alot of AP courses and would like to do any other HS activities or clubs then it will be very tough to get club soccer in on top of it. The club coaches will not work with other activities/sports. He will be pressured to make a choice. You are fortunate if you can get a club coach that works with HS soccer, they are a minority too. If he does not plan on playing after HS and does not care to do soccer year round then let him experience other things.

I appreciate the responses. Based on what has been said, it sounds like he might not have a problem playing at HS soccer level even though he won't be getting club level coaching.

My son intends to do other activities in HS (place kicker for football, play tennis, and who knows what else will pop into his head!) In addition, he is on track to take some fairly rigorous academic classes. College soccer is probably not in his future --- except maybe intramural stuff for fun.

Now ----- if I can only talk him out of the idea of getting a Boston Terrier. I don't want a dog.

Depending on where you live Mid-cities U19 rec league is almost all HS players that do multiple sports or cant afford club. Playing in the fall can be a good HS warm up depending on the association and coach.

DadofDefense wrote:I appreciate the responses. Based on what has been said, it sounds like he might not have a problem playing at HS soccer level even though he won't be getting club level coaching.

My son intends to do other activities in HS (place kicker for football, play tennis, and who knows what else will pop into his head!) In addition, he is on track to take some fairly rigorous academic classes. College soccer is probably not in his future --- except maybe intramural stuff for fun.

Now ----- if I can only talk him out of the idea of getting a Boston Terrier. I don't want a dog.

A Boston Terrier's life expectancy is 13 to 15 years. Your son leaves for college in 5 years and they won't let him have a dog in the dorms.

it seems that the kid wants to do a number of things. There is nothing wrong with kids that chose to stop playing a sport and try lots of different things. If he wants all of these other things and doesn't not intend to play college soccer what would be the purpose of continuing sacrificing free time to play club soccer.

Mine is in all PreAp courses - so long as they stay up with their work it is not a problem. If they get behind, well it is a long weekend or nights catching up, but at this age it is their choice - mom/dad can't do it - they have to want it.

[quote="TxHunter"]Mine is in all PreAp courses - so long as they stay up with their work it is not a problem. If they get behind, well it is a long weekend or nights catching up, but at this age it is their choice - mom/dad can't do it - they have to want it.[/quote]

Definitely.

A bit of a different perspective...

My DH was a HS soccer coach for 12 years. He quit coaching to "run" our children to club practices & private skills coachin & games &.... The middle child (daughter) wants to play HS soccer purely for the social aspect of it. DH is against letting her play school soccer because of the potential for injuries. Interestingly enough, we've been to several HS boys & girls games as spectators this season & I've witnessed 3 injuries, all which have been serious enough to have taken a club player out for their club season. (And yes all 3 played club ball too.)

The combination of hormones, recklessness and weight lifting results in injuries on the boys side. I have seen plenty of injuries this season at high school games. It does not help that some coaches encourage the players to "tackle harder" in order to win the ball.

I must say, you all are helping me to figure out how to talk to him. I DO NOT want to be the parent that forces my kid to do something he has no interest in; however, I will not allow him to withdraw from everything either.

I've always knew that his future career would not be in professional sports so he has to enjoy what he does for recreation.



I still do not want a dog!!!

[quote="DadofDefense"]I must say, you all are helping me to figure out how to talk to him. I DO NOT want to be the parent that forces my kid to do something he has no interest in; however, I will not allow him to withdraw from everything either.

I've always knew that his future career would not be in professional sports so he has to enjoy what he does for recreation.



I still do not want a dog!!! [/quote]

Dog hater!!!

Real Barcelona wrote:The combination of hormones, recklessness and weight lifting results in injuries on the boys side. I have seen plenty of injuries this season at high school games. It does not help that some coaches encourage the players to "tackle harder" in order to win the ball.

What you say is true but in taking time to think about it I do not think I have seen more, or more serious, injuries in HS than select. In fact the worst injury I have seen was in Premier League, leg broken in 3 places. In fact it is that game and a DC game against Penn Fusion last year that where the two most physical and out of control games I have ever seen. In HS games thuggery is a result the factors Real stated. Although rarer in select, when it happens, it is taught and encouraged to more athletic, intense players and thus is much more dangerous.

DadofDefense wrote:My son came to me last night and stated that he might not want to play club soccer next year. His reasoning is that he will be in HS and will be "so busy". No final decision was made last night.

I remember quitting soccer just before HS and wanting a do-over a few years later. He wants to play soccer for his HS and he enjoys his current club team more than any other club he has ever played for. I am on board with his desire to play HS soccer but think it would be a mistake not to be playing in the meantime.

Have you had to address this with your son? Is HS life so busy that the schedule of club soccer makes it that much more difficult? Any advice?

He can play both CL and HS at the same time. If he is Academy player, he needs to make a decision on either - or, but not both per USSF.

CL and HS coaches understand the desire and usually accommodate these players.

We know some good players that quit Academy teams for HS soccer, and that is where the fun is.

I wished that Academy players were permitted to play HS. It is an extra touch on the ball and a lot of fun.

DadofDefense wrote:I must say, you all are helping me to figure out how to talk to him. I DO NOT want to be the parent that forces my kid to do something he has no interest in; however, I will not allow him to withdraw from everything either.

I've always knew that his future career would not be in professional sports so he has to enjoy what he does for recreation.



I still do not want a dog!!!

Then just say 'no'.

Mine just finished his freshman year of high school soccer about 6 weeks ago.

He was fortunate enough to win some individual accolades. So, in that sense it was beneficial. Playing varsity and making all district. it boosts his confidence.

That said, he knows there is a HUGE difference between club and hs ball.

And he does want to play at the next level.

There are rules in place where we live that forbids simultaneous club and hs participation.

In fact, next year he will have to probably choose between hs and club.

if he wants to see where soccer can take him, it is an easy choice.

I have only told him that I won't spend the money and the travel for club soccer if he isn't willing to put in 5-6 days a week training.

My personal opinion is that you can't give teenagers too many choices. They have to learn to set priorities. Yes, let them be kids. But, they have to honor their commitments.

And he also knows he has to keep a certain GPA in order to do any of it.

I really don't see the justification for club soccer (especially given the costs in NTX) if they aren't pursuing next level opportunities.

You can play indoor/futsal and adult league to stay sharp for hs ball. (Depending on age.)

My 9th grade son played for the high school this year and loved it. Club team took a little time off in Jan then had two practices a week(one on weekend). My son went to the one on the weekend and only went to the weekday one if his schoolwork was finished. He also ran track where he ran before school and then went to hs soccer (and soccer also practiced after school). He carries a rigorous academic load and was able to keep up with it all. But he is very dedicated to his studies and doesn't dawdle when it comes to homework or studying. Said HS soccer was a blast. He didn't encounter any more injuries/roughness/hacking that he hasn't seen in club.